Sunday, July 20, 2008

LSD Man Page. More Linux/Unix Humor

Happy Sunday,

As I pull these articles out of the vaults, I'm surprised at how many of them are still floating around on the web. I actually found this man page for LSD on a lot of sites, and the contributor who posted it to the alt.drugs newsgroup, so many years ago, doesn't seem to know who the original author was, either. That may have been a wise choice, on the author's part, considering the subject matter. Unfortunately, we didn't have time to track down any good links to humor repositories carrying this that weren't more drug than Linux/Unix related, so this post is virtually hyperlink free!

Bear in mind that this blog, as an entity, discourages drug use, but makes no value judgments about anyone who exercises their right to do things to themselves that may or may not be potentially harmful or illegal. It's your body and your life. Enjoy it. ...In moderation :)

Without further ado, please enjoy and have a nice relaxing Sunday!

, Mike

Note: The original header and footer have been preserved to maintain the integrity of the original post and ensure that full attribution is given to whomever took the time to create the clever little flip-flop on the standard man page and the poster who helped pass it along. Particularly enjoyed the subtle references to Timothy Leary and The Beatles :)


Subject: LSD 4.3
Summary: Better living thru Unix
Message-ID: <2709@bloom-beacon.MIT.EDU>
Date: 1 Feb 88 16:48:13 GMT
Reply-To: (Gary L. Dryfoos)
Organization: Massachusetts Institute of Technology

LSD(1) UNIX Programmer's Manual LSD(1)

lsd - turn off your mind, relax, and float downstream

lsd [ -dsS ] brandname user ...

Disturbs the given users according to dosage, set, and setting.
If more than one user is specified, each will be affected by the
others, according to the arguments they give to lsd on their
own terminals or machines. It is recommended that one of the users
in a group specify a dose of 0, and that at least one other user be
experienced in using lsd.

Brandname is usually a blotter pattern, but may be used to specify
a non-blotter form, such as "windowpane" or "pyramid."

There are a number of options, each of which can have a strange and
not completely predictable effect on the users:

-d Dosage. A dosage of 1 to 3 is recommended for first time
users, although strength varies with brandname and storage

-s Set. Recommended values are "calm," "happy," and "groovy."
Sets like "angry," "frustrated," and "bummed" may cause file
system damage, and should be avoided. For these sets, other
utilities are available (see "valium").

-S Setting. Recommended are "familiar," "interesting," and
"comfortable." Hostile and challenging settings are reserved
for experienced users.

/etc/trips is a log of system-wide use of lsd since booting.

When invoked with incorrect arguments, lsd will print out a random,
Unixy-sounding error message and remove this man page. This policy
prevents misuse by undergraduates and fundamentalist Christians.

User state should return to normal in twelve hours or less after
invoking lsd. With extreme parameters, however, this cannot always
be guaranteed.

The output device is assumed to be 80 columns wide.


I don't know where it came from originally, so Please Use Carefully!
(Remember: Dosage, Set, and SETENV)

Gary L. Dryfoos ARPA/Internet:
UUCP/Usenet: ...ihnp4!mit-eddie!!dryfoo
Phone: (617) 253-0184 / (617) 825-6115
USPS: E40-318, M.I.T., Cambridge, MA 02139
"So, you cannot resist, can you? No, no one can! When LeMott sings,
they dance! Ha-ha-ha! They all dance!"